The Worst Start Imaginable In Melbourne


Without a shadow of a doubt, the first hour or two in Melbourne has been our worst experience in Australia yet. Things can only get better from here… I hope!

A Homeless Thief

We hadn’t even fully dropped of the Jucy Camper before disaster struck. We were unloading our bags and left a couple of them in the Jucy garage whilst getting the others from the van. When we came back to sort everything out, I noticed one wasn’t there. I thought I must have misplaced it and I wish that was all it was.

Suzanne had looked out on the street and saw where my bag had ended up. In the hands of a dirt, thieving homeless *insert a bad word here*!! I went out and confronted the thief, only for him to repeatedly shout “this is my bag”. Sure it was… it only had my passport, toiletries and other possessions inside. The manky so and so was rattling through my toiletries and other things and placing some of his possessions inside the bag. I eventually got it back and we had to empty it. We threw all his junk (including his tobacco) in the bin – revenge is sweet. So that was strike one for Melbourne.

Over-Priced Hostel

After a 20 minute walk, we arrived at a hostel we had seen that advertised for $28 a night. However, when we arrived they wanted $48 per night. We mentioned how we had seen it on HostelWorld for $28 then they miraculously found 2 spare beds in 2 separate rooms that were listed for that price. Only thing was; they still wanted to charge $38. So, we decided to politely say no thanks and went off in search of a more reasonable priced hostel. Strike two, Melbourne.

Ignorant Bus Driver

After locating a hostel at a more reasonable price (Hostel Plus Collingwood – $27) we decided to head for it. Our only problem was that it was an hour and a half walk and with our heavy bags – no thank you. So we attempted to get a bus. As we had just arrived, we knew little of the public transport methods. Never-the-less we hailed a bus, only to be told we couldn’t ride without a travel card. Now, that’s fair enough, I understand that but the driver was extremely ignorant and wouldn’t help us in the slightest. After finding a 7/11 to buy travel cards, we finally caught a bus and what a difference in drivers! This guy was brilliant and made sure we got the right stop and told us a few other things about public transport.

So far, I’ve not enjoyed Melbourne one bit. In fact, it’s probably my least favourite place in Australia so far but I’m hoping I’ve just been quick to judge. Time will tell.

Have you ever been to Melbourne? I’d love to hear about your experience! And is there any advice you would give us for surviving this city and finding a job?

Thanks for reading,


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Hey, I'm Alzo! I went from working as a waiter to traveler and photographer. I run Alzos Adventures with the hopes that it inspires you to get out and have your own adventures and explore our beautiful world.

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